Rihanna...she's so awesome!

Oh Rihanna, where do I begin with your badness? Every song you touch seems to suck, and your voice gets more and more annoying. Not to mention, you have a tendency to take a sample from an awesome song and your powers of sucktitude almost ruin the original for me. Here we go….

This song just bites it all and I’m sure you all have heard it. Even if it is painful and you want to forget about it. It starts off cool enough with a short rap from Jay-Z, so you may be thinking that the song may have some potential. Oh you couldn’t me more wrong my friends. In comes her obnoxious dry voice infected with her constant inflections and yodeling. The song goes on forever and never gets any better. Plus could she repeat “ella, ella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, ella, ella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh” any more? It’s annoying as hell, SHUT UP!



Here’s her first single that got big here, “Pon de replay”. Here she is trying to bring her Caribbean flavor to us here in the States. At first it’s not too bad. I still hate her voice, but she’s not trying to be annoying like in the Umbrella song. Then it happens! About a minute into the song she keeps telling Mr. DJ to turn the music up. There is some other junk she rambles in between her requests for louder music, but that’s all that sticks with me. I’m not sure what happens after that, I couldn’t listen to anymore.




So here is “SOS”. This is the song were she sampled Soft Cell’s “Tainted Love”, and laid her horrible voice onto a more modern beat. Surprising to me, she wasn’t nearly as annoying on this song as the previous two I posted. Even though the song is four and a half minutes long, she didn’t find any phrases to repeat a thousand times. So, maybe this isn’t quite so bad after all? Is that possible? Is there something wrong with me? Let’s move on.



“Please don’t stop the music!” “Please don’t stop the music!” “Please don’t stop the music!” “Please don’t stop the music!” Ever heard this before? I have, that’s all this song says. Well that and the part where she rapes the classic chant "Mama-se, mama-sa, mama-coo-sa" from Michael Jackson’s “Wanna be startin’ somethin’” and turns it into (shocking gasp) an annoying, repeated Rihannanized blast of audio shit!



This last one is more of a personal hatred. Let’s give you some info about me, I love Maroon 5. I think they are great and love both of there albums. When I found out that “If I never see your face again” was the next single I was happy because that was my favorite song on the album at that time. Then I found out they rerecorded the song with Rihanna and was very disappointed that she was going to ruin a good song. Much like how Beyonce ruined Justin’s “Until the end of time”. Not that I would listen to Justin Timberlake, but I heard from some people that it was a really good song on the album and her singing on it make it suck. I will admit that it’s not a horrible performance, but being a huge fan of the original it is hard to listen to her voice taint the coolness which was the original.

Lip Gloss?

When did music succumb to using "Lip Gloss" as the main ingredient of a song and it's lyrics.

This post is just an addition to the post from last week.

This can't be ignored!

I know it's been almost a month since our last post, and it's all because I have been super busy. But this song cannot be ignored! I think that it has to be one of the worst songs ever made and played on national air waves. The lyrics, (if you can call them that) are retarded and repetitive, and there is an obnoxious air raid siren going off the whole time along with some stupid ass hype man saying, "yeah" constantly. I couldn't even make it half way through the song. I challenge all of you to get all the way through it. Good luck to you all!

Emo Rock SUCKS!

I wish the "Gong Show" still existed, only it was for current artists to let them know what people really thought of their music! Maybe then this group would finally disappear.

Country music is stupid!

I found the name of this song on a website and didn't believe that it was real. Much to my dispair, not only is it real...it has a video too. I haven't listen to the song, so it might not even be shitty. Considering the name of it is "She thinks my tractor is sexy", I'm pretty sure it is. Well that and it's a country song.

Part Gay

This one go's out to everyone who was on this guy's jock when this song came out. F**king RED HAT! Is he still wearing that hat? You still cannot where a red hat in North America without some saying "sup Fred Douche". I think this video shows all his talents. Damn! he got like crazy boy band ass. I bet you he keeps his hat on.

Shit from the block

I hate Jennifer Lopez. Her music is horrid and her looks are totally overrated. She's also totally full of herself. In this song, she talks about how even though she's all awesome and rich, she's just Jenny from the block. What a crock of shit!

ICE Say's it Best!

Go Ninja Go.

What can I say that hasn't been said.

Another WTF moment...

Another WTF moment brought to you by Christopher Columbus day. I think that if he even knew this video was going to exist by coming to this country, he would have committed suicide or opted for the scurvy.



However, if he saw the after the fact video maybe he would have changed his mind. I think only someone like Jim Carrey could have saved his fate with comedy like this.

Hey there?

This worthless piece is another song that is way overplayed. {shock} It fearures some whiny guy singing to some chick about who knows. All I know is that if you want to be a whiny guy with a guitar, and/or piano(The Fray, Snow Patrol) ... Shut the hell up! How bad can it be?

To whom it may concern...I Hate You!!

I had actually forgotten about this song, thankfully. Well then some smacktard on the radio requested it today and brought it searing back into my head. So, to the fan of Lou Bega's "Mambo No.5," I hate you! You, sir, are an asshole.

OMG WTF Part 2

I couldn't bare even watching the original video so I found this one instead.

Like I said in response to the "Crazytown" post, I think these bands like the above are offspring from other crappy bands. They somehow mated and their offspring are polluting the American music industry.

I mean if your gonna re-do the "Hey Mickey" song, at least put some references in there to show that you do have some class.

Enjoy the sadness/madness! ! !

You mean it's not Limp Bizkit???

I will start off by saying that I actually liked the first two Limp Bizkit albums. They were a lot of fun to listen too. But by the third, it sounded less like Limp Bizkit and more like the Fred Durst, I really like myself, Band. So when this song came out and sounded exactly like a bad Limp Bizkit song, I couldn't believe it. This band came out and straight stole the guitar style from Wes Borland of Limp. Which at that point in his Limp career, he probably could've cared less and was just making shit up anyways. Enter Crazytown. Which is a stupid name, by the way. Anyways, they must have heard the latest Limp Bizkit song and realized that the quickest way to fame was to steal another band's music and make a lame ass song out of it. Let's recap, Limp Bizkit starting into there sucky phase. Crazytown (stupid name) trying to find fame by stealing guitar riffs from said sucky phase and being different by making a cool rap-rock song that was a trend already on it's way out to the trend graveyard. Put all that together in a pot and mix, and you get a huge mass of musical shit. This is getting long enough, so I won't even begin making fun of the way these tools look. "Oh, we're so different by looking like 90% of all the other edgy rockers of today!" Fuck them! Crazytown sucks! Here's their shit...



Update:
I found this afterwards and thought it was pretty funny. I found it here

Question
Do you know why Crazy Town was booed at the OZZfest? because I think the Gift of Game is really good. Why do people not like them?

Answer
Well personally I think they're pretty crap, but so are lots of the Ozzfest bands. Real hard rock doesn't need to try and fake a 'tough' attitude like the kind of bands that play there.

In answer to your question of why they were booed, Wikipedia has this to say: "[Butterfly] also cost the band credibility among hard rock fans because of the single's sugary sound and heavy airplay on mainstream radio. The fans' backlash against Crazy Town was evident during Ozzfest when they were booed and pelted with urine-filled bottles during their performance. [citation needed] This was all a result of Billy Calanca a band member who actually liked being drenched in urine."

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

The Brown Note is real! I have proof!

What the hell is with Shakira? I don't speak spanish, so I don't know if she sounds any better on her spanish albums. But when she sings in english it hurts me. There are literal pains that goes across my body when I hear her voice. But this song in particular, actually creates the mythical Brown Note. (click link for definition, if you don't already know.) I'm not sure about the rest of you, but yodelling sucks, and has only been popular in the Alps. So why is it a columbian chick can yodel, and it's cool? So grab a diaper, listen to this, and have fun!